Ugh - The anti-bullying movement. I was suspicious of this from the beginning, and sure enough, my daughter came home from school everyday complaining she had been bullied. No, someone was mean to you, and I see you being mean too. Meanwhile, I see the same kind of terrible bullying, the kind of thing I would have recognized as bullying from my own childhood, going totally unaddressed. But they pat themselves on the back for confronting bullying at all levels. It's terrible.
Chaya Leah is 100% about media literacy. Honestly - teachers are freaking out rn bc of chat gpt being the end of education, but really it just means that some subjects will be more relevant than others, and new disciplines of study will need to emerge. I think the education system is way behind on this.
This was a very interesting conversation in regards to dating, marriage, etc. Sometimes I wonder if arranged marriages will have to come back in the secular west. Perhaps not in the way we traditionally imagine arranged marriages, but perhaps some new system can be created where people can be matched to an ideal mate for them. I bet there’s some AI dating app companies already in development for this lol
I enjoyed - as always - your most recent podcast. In fact, I only subscribe to two podcasts - Ask a Jew and A Special Place in Hell - so obviously I am a big fan.
However... I take great exception to the idea that women are somehow more advanced then men - even in the specific context of professional achievement and relationships. Women do graduate from college at significantly higher rates than men. However, there is a giant caveat to consider, which is there are millions of stable, middle to upper middle class jobs filled by men that do not require a college education. Only a fraction of women have either the interest or capability to fill these roles, which subsequently requires them to attend expensive and time consuming degree programs. Women - who dominate fields such as nursing, social services and education - will often not earn as much as men in professions with limited to no academic requirements - law enforcement, fire fighting, electricians, plumbers, forestry, sanitation, trucking, auto repair, etc. etc. etc.
In regard to relationships, women are dramatically more judgmental and demanding than men. Here are some of the many hoops men are typically expected to jump thru to find a match: reasonable level of attractiveness, good health, ambition and/or professional success, intelligence, confidence, to be a gentleman (except when being a gentleman is not desirable), leadership capability, decisive, fulfill a minimum height requirement, fulfill a minimum hair requirement, ability to make their partner feel protected, sense of humor, no stereotypical photos on dating profiles (e.g., no sports cars, fishing or boats), political compatibility (Trumpers certainly need not apply for half of females. I was actually recently rejected because I was too moderate), desire to have kids, a willingness to listen endlessly about either the Housewives of fill in the blank or woke nonsense (as I believe Meghan has previously commented - women are the primary proponents of this sensibility), patience, an expectation to pay for most dates, be positive, serve as the designated driver (always), religious and ethnic compatibility, and the ability to perform reasonably well in the bedroom.
Here is what drives men in most cases: attraction. Most men like many other traits as well. But, if there is chemistry, we are three quarters of the way there. So, to be wildly un-PC (on a site that embraces free thought) women SHOULD be dramatically more attractive than their male counterparts to make up for this endless list. However, I would argue that probably isn't the case either, and that men on average fall across the spectrum appearance-wise to a comparable degree as women.
Keep up the great show Yael and Chaya Leah (and Meghan!)
Totally agree about teaching media literacy (we did a bit of this when I was in high school), the task would be keeping the teachers up to date with the latest developments - I think the kids would know more (image manip etc) in some cases.
Regarding bullying, I wasn’t aware of how the term was introduced to the school system- would be great to have CL’s mother on for a chat sometime! Like CL, my school got rid of boys after year 4, but there was lots of bullying in later years from girls so not sure if separated schools have less bullying, maybe a different kind?
Listened to a very interesting podcast on bullying (Modern Wisdom interview with Tony Volk who researches bullying) where most of what I thought I knew about bullying was debunked! I got bullied quite a lot when I was younger, so was interesting to look back on it with this information. Would be interested to hear both of your thoughts!
Chaya Leah -- you mentioned that your community Rebbe recommends that everyone in your community gets a mentor. What was the Hebrew term for that word? I am so intrigued by the free and full life you seem to live with the all of the obligations and Orthodox customs and practices. I do think the two are related. What I sense from Yael and her peers (and no criticism as I was raised in the 70s and was very independent and dating and all kinds of stuff in my 20s), is that there might be more of a sense of untethered-ness and unhappiness with too much freedom. I am definitely a product of that which is why perhaps I have been turning back to Judaism and making efforts to unplug and observe Shabbat, be mindful of Kashrut and observe where I can. I guess I need more structure and meaning and community and the intellectual nature of Torah and Talmud seems to hold that for me. Now I just need a real live community of people! In any event, I appreciate everything you both share.
Such a great interview, conversation. I laughed, I listened, I wished I could jump into the convo, I heard some new things I have never considered. It was one of my favorite episodes. Though all of them are pretty fab. Please do Shabat dinners! I want to come! Funny, growing up I strongly believed (insisted) that I was a Jewish opera singer in my past life. xo
This episode did a holocaust to mentioning the holocaust.
I hope to come back in my next life as cool as Tim Riggins.
Ugh - The anti-bullying movement. I was suspicious of this from the beginning, and sure enough, my daughter came home from school everyday complaining she had been bullied. No, someone was mean to you, and I see you being mean too. Meanwhile, I see the same kind of terrible bullying, the kind of thing I would have recognized as bullying from my own childhood, going totally unaddressed. But they pat themselves on the back for confronting bullying at all levels. It's terrible.
I want Chaya Leah to be my mashpia 😭
Chaya Leah is 100% about media literacy. Honestly - teachers are freaking out rn bc of chat gpt being the end of education, but really it just means that some subjects will be more relevant than others, and new disciplines of study will need to emerge. I think the education system is way behind on this.
This was a very interesting conversation in regards to dating, marriage, etc. Sometimes I wonder if arranged marriages will have to come back in the secular west. Perhaps not in the way we traditionally imagine arranged marriages, but perhaps some new system can be created where people can be matched to an ideal mate for them. I bet there’s some AI dating app companies already in development for this lol
I enjoyed - as always - your most recent podcast. In fact, I only subscribe to two podcasts - Ask a Jew and A Special Place in Hell - so obviously I am a big fan.
However... I take great exception to the idea that women are somehow more advanced then men - even in the specific context of professional achievement and relationships. Women do graduate from college at significantly higher rates than men. However, there is a giant caveat to consider, which is there are millions of stable, middle to upper middle class jobs filled by men that do not require a college education. Only a fraction of women have either the interest or capability to fill these roles, which subsequently requires them to attend expensive and time consuming degree programs. Women - who dominate fields such as nursing, social services and education - will often not earn as much as men in professions with limited to no academic requirements - law enforcement, fire fighting, electricians, plumbers, forestry, sanitation, trucking, auto repair, etc. etc. etc.
In regard to relationships, women are dramatically more judgmental and demanding than men. Here are some of the many hoops men are typically expected to jump thru to find a match: reasonable level of attractiveness, good health, ambition and/or professional success, intelligence, confidence, to be a gentleman (except when being a gentleman is not desirable), leadership capability, decisive, fulfill a minimum height requirement, fulfill a minimum hair requirement, ability to make their partner feel protected, sense of humor, no stereotypical photos on dating profiles (e.g., no sports cars, fishing or boats), political compatibility (Trumpers certainly need not apply for half of females. I was actually recently rejected because I was too moderate), desire to have kids, a willingness to listen endlessly about either the Housewives of fill in the blank or woke nonsense (as I believe Meghan has previously commented - women are the primary proponents of this sensibility), patience, an expectation to pay for most dates, be positive, serve as the designated driver (always), religious and ethnic compatibility, and the ability to perform reasonably well in the bedroom.
Here is what drives men in most cases: attraction. Most men like many other traits as well. But, if there is chemistry, we are three quarters of the way there. So, to be wildly un-PC (on a site that embraces free thought) women SHOULD be dramatically more attractive than their male counterparts to make up for this endless list. However, I would argue that probably isn't the case either, and that men on average fall across the spectrum appearance-wise to a comparable degree as women.
Keep up the great show Yael and Chaya Leah (and Meghan!)
I’m aghast at Meghan’s cruel dismissal of Kyle Chandler and Jack Russells. How can you hate Wishbone?
I also loved Early Edition - why doesn’t anyone stream this?
Great episode! Bring back appreciating beauty!
Totally agree about teaching media literacy (we did a bit of this when I was in high school), the task would be keeping the teachers up to date with the latest developments - I think the kids would know more (image manip etc) in some cases.
Regarding bullying, I wasn’t aware of how the term was introduced to the school system- would be great to have CL’s mother on for a chat sometime! Like CL, my school got rid of boys after year 4, but there was lots of bullying in later years from girls so not sure if separated schools have less bullying, maybe a different kind?
Listened to a very interesting podcast on bullying (Modern Wisdom interview with Tony Volk who researches bullying) where most of what I thought I knew about bullying was debunked! I got bullied quite a lot when I was younger, so was interesting to look back on it with this information. Would be interested to hear both of your thoughts!
Chaya Leah -- you mentioned that your community Rebbe recommends that everyone in your community gets a mentor. What was the Hebrew term for that word? I am so intrigued by the free and full life you seem to live with the all of the obligations and Orthodox customs and practices. I do think the two are related. What I sense from Yael and her peers (and no criticism as I was raised in the 70s and was very independent and dating and all kinds of stuff in my 20s), is that there might be more of a sense of untethered-ness and unhappiness with too much freedom. I am definitely a product of that which is why perhaps I have been turning back to Judaism and making efforts to unplug and observe Shabbat, be mindful of Kashrut and observe where I can. I guess I need more structure and meaning and community and the intellectual nature of Torah and Talmud seems to hold that for me. Now I just need a real live community of people! In any event, I appreciate everything you both share.
Such a great interview, conversation. I laughed, I listened, I wished I could jump into the convo, I heard some new things I have never considered. It was one of my favorite episodes. Though all of them are pretty fab. Please do Shabat dinners! I want to come! Funny, growing up I strongly believed (insisted) that I was a Jewish opera singer in my past life. xo